NANNY...NORTH....TORONTO BOUND

MADDISON, MY LITTLE GIRL....

2012-01-06T21:53:00.000-05:00

She couldn't wait , it was time for her to go ......
Maddy was having seizures the week before Christmas ....very short ...less than a minute...but.....on the afternoon of Christmas day she had a heart attack and she was gone...I was on my way home on Boxing day coming across on the Ferry from St. Johns to Digby when I heard...I spent the 3 hour trip sitting outside crying my eyes out ....I am sure a couple of people who didn't know what was wrong were watching ....thinking I might jump.
The question of why wasn't I told on Christmas Day ? maybe because my idiot ex wanted to make sure that Maddy was sent away to be cremated before I got there,thinking I guess,that I would want something different ?
And then I find out that Maddy died alone while idiot was next door having some Christmas Cheer, and also I find out that he abandoned her the day before,running around the neighbourhood having drinks crying on everyone's shoulder that Maddy "was not good" when he should have had his ass home taking care of her. Selfish son of a bitch|!! Always telling everyone how much he loved my dogs and calling them his dogs.
But what can you expect from a drunk anyway. Of all the things that hurt me most about this is that my little girl died alone and there was no need of it...no need at all...had I been there it would never, ever have happened ....she gave me so much love and devotion...I could never have left her alone in her time of need.....

MY LITTLE MADDY....

2011-12-16T16:03:00.000-05:00

It saddens me to find out that my little girl dog Maddie was diagnosed a couple of weeks ago with a heart condition, she is now on heart pills and was doing pretty good until she had a couple of seizures 2 days ago and yesterday. It seems that maybe she has low blood sugar so she will be going back to the vet on Monday for blood work. I am so worried about her and I know shes 3 months shy of being 12 but she and her brother have been very special to me and helped me through some hard times in my life. I couldn't take them to the Arctic so they are living in Shelburne and are well taken care of by my ex...and when I go home they go with me for the vacation time that I have. I am really hoping that she gets at least a few more years , she enjoys life so much just sitting and watching the squirrels, going in the car and she loves her walks. I will be home on the 27th and she will be the first non human I will go see !!

I AM SO BLOODY SLACK ...OR REALLY BUSY !!

2011-12-16T15:50:00.000-05:00

I'll take the latter because these 1 and 2 year old boys keep me hopping !!
So the trip home with my grandson was just perfect, he hadn't been home and I hadn't seen him for 4 years so the very next night I took him to see an old friend of his dads and even though the plan was to be back by 10 or 11 pm, my sons good friend Mo was still telling stories to his son at 2 am. It was priceless and that trip was best thing I could have done for him and me .Memories ...its all we have....
Pat was glad he had come home ...he didn't realize that he had actually missed it, familiar things , family...since that trip in August he went home again in October...I think he will do so more often ....
We decided to find all the videos of Shawn that we could and get them on to a DVD before they were lost.... so between his grandfather and I we got several copies of each and passed them around to the family...memories....It's all we have....

AND WE ARE BACK !!!

2011-09-09T11:03:00.002-04:00

WOW, What a life !, ended up going back to Baffin for 2.5 months in the spring , then back to the country ranch for 7 weeks, just past Elton Johns place : ) seriously ! then back to To. Since then we have settled down a lot more ,flew my grandson and his mom up for a 8 day visit in July, greeted Dom at the airport with a clown , he was floored !, took them out to the ranch,to the Lion Safari which was awesome, Ontario place and Toronto Zoo. It was such a treat having them here.
Then I planned the trip out West to see Gordie, what fun that was, Carol, Karl and myself, landed in Calgary , drove West through the mountains to Canmore then North through the Rockies. Stayed at Mica Mountain Lodge on the way through and Heavens Edge Lodge on the way back.
The next adventure is flying my grandson Patrick from Calgary to Toronto on Sept 30th.and then we are headed home to N. S for a few days visit. I haven't seen him in 4 years so this will be wonderfull.
I had planned to go to the Silver Cities in Mexico in Dec. but since then I have been looking at a trip to the Copper Canyons which are further South of there. The only problem is it will have to be at some other time of year so I'm aiming for next October ! This Christmas...maybe just a jaunt down to N.B and N.S.
The weather is the only thing I mind here in To, hot and humid for almost 3 months, it just broke about 3 days ago, man its rough, but it could be worse so I will thank the Lord that it isn't. The only thing I realy missed were the awesome thunder storms they had here early August while we were in B.C . Darn !!! Think I miss the Arctic !!

WHERE DID I GO ??

2011-03-06T11:46:00.000-05:00

Someone asked me why I hadn't been blogging...well; because I've had my hands full I guess. Settling in to Toronto is no small feat, the boss let me outfit my room so of couse loving to save money and always looking to do so , I found Kijiji and bought everything there , even my Ipod ! That required driving around the big city by myself usually, picking up all my gem finds ! and I did well, only took a few wrong turns but always found my way back, such an adventure ! and now that I have been here awhile, it's not so bad : )

I guess once you get to know a place it gets smaller....I have been to a play by Christopher Plummer called "Barrymore" that was really halarious and you know I love humour ! Last night was the Mariinsky Ballet "Swan Lake" absolutely thrilling music and dancers, just beautifull, Soon we will be attending the musical "South Pacific".

Have been sampling some of the great food to be found around here, riding the subway just to get used to it, looking forward to a trip on a "GO" train, but will save that for summer. Next weekend on Saturday morning a trip to the St. Lawrence market is planned, can't wait !

Also on the lookout for a new camera, a dock for my Ipod and a family Doctor !!

Planning a trip to see Darren , Jess and Dominic for Easter, a trip home 1st week of July, a trip with brother Karl and sister Carol out to Alberta to see our oldest brother Gordie and my grandson Patrick 2nd week of August and maybe another week home in October and making plans for the big trip to Mexico for December !!

All of this, plus looking after my two beautiful charges keeps me pretty busy !!

VISITING THE NORTH

2010-10-30T10:22:00.000-04:00

Anyone who thinks that this isn't a gift of a lifetime, does not understand their Canada and that you should make all effort to take the opportunity when the Arctic comes a calling.

Very few people have been on Baffin Island, when you compare it to the population of Nova Scotia even. A very spirtual place, a place where death is just across a very thin line.... if you step over it.

Meeting the Inuit elders wo are so gentle and kind of heart, watching the mums AND the dads, carry their children on their backs in beautifuly home made "Amouti " parkas, to see the trappings of wilderness roaming in a Government seat city , to walk the tundra where ancient plants still thrive,to bathe in the glory of the Northern Lights gleaming above your head, to see the leftovers of a distant ice age.........you would be a fool to give up the chance to come here !!.......just saying : )

TORONTO BOUND......32 days

2010-10-20T21:07:00.000-04:00

I have been trying to figure out why I am going to end up in Toronto, Ontario ? Hopefully to win the lottery... since it appears that that's where most of the winners come from : )
I have never liked Toronto.... or at least the week I spent there once on a management course. Too many people, too much smog, just not my thing. Fortunately the bosses mom has a beautiful ranch style home an hour outside of the city where I can take the kids, lots of horses, bison farms, markets ...everything !! I will love that !!
The other thing I will love are the really good restaurants so I can experience some new cuisine. And there are plays, operas, hockey games, comedy clubs ( which I adore ) china town for shopping, and loads of other stuff to do.
Now that my knee is shaping up I can hopefully start a weight lifting program again. There is a gym close by with a trainer, so that should work out well !
Still I am not so sure of the summers, I will certainly be missing the cool fresh air here in the Arctic , on those horrible humid days that Toronto suffers through every summer for two to three weeks.
Those will be the days to get out of town !!
Once settled I will start planning my trip to Mexico for next December...getting so very excited and not the least bit worried about the problems their having , as its no where near where I will be. I miss that Country so much ! I want to check out the school in Techuacan, as that's where I've been accepted to teach, and I may do that one of these days in the foreseeable future , if I live that long : )

FAREWELL TO THE NORTH !!

2010-10-19T12:08:00.000-04:00

I don't know where to start ! Has this been one of the most exciting adventures of my life ?...yes ! Would I do it again ...mmmm , have to think on that, If I did , I would have to go further North , definately ! Would I live here longer, I think so , assuming I had a 4 wheeler, skido, 4 wheel drive truck, and a couple of loaded rifle's !! and hung out with the Inuit.
I like the Inuit peoples, not terrible fond of some of the white people hanging around here, a lot of misfits, but their everywhere I guess. The Inuit are a community minded group,very kind .They take care of each other, at least in the smaller communities. A whale is caught, it is shared by all, as is caribou or any large animal. A good way to live. But how long this will last with the influence of Southerners is unknown.
The Government is here and they are after the resources. Why else would you be in this part of the world ? Sure as heck , not for the beaches and palm trees : ) !!
But it has been an adventure for sure, one that I would highly recommend to anyone looking for a complete change in cuture or just a change of scenery. There are not many people who can say they have lived on Baffin Island, thats for sure !

KARL , MY BABY BROTHER

2010-10-03T17:56:00.000-04:00

One of my favourite people in the whole wide world is this guy. So gentle, never outspoken, but says what he thinks when its necessary. We teased him a lot when he was a kid but we took care of him too. And the one person he reminds me of out of all the family is my Uncle Charlie, gone now, but I loved him dearly and Karl is just like him in spirit, personality and looks !
Karl is married to a wonderful woman who I think has been the light of his life ever since he met her...they have raised two fine young people and have done well for themselves throughout the years.
I am very proud to call him my brother, and though we don't see each other often , I love him to bits !!

THE INTRUDER

2010-08-27T13:16:00.001-04:00

The other evening while out, I saw a white convertible and thought " the nerve of some people ", intruding here with that , in this sacred place ....then looked across the harbour at piles upon piles of dark storm clouds, layering the horizon, and the next morning I write...

The dark voluptuous clouds, line the horizon, stacked one on one
They stare at me from across the cold freeze of water
I am the intruder.....

The bear, muscles quivering under a coat the colour of clotted cream
The eyes glaring ,walks not that far behind me
I am the intruder.....

The tundra screams as I tread across it's glorious skin
The beautiful ancient plants cry silently at the sting
I am the intruder....

As I walk the path of many before me,
The ancient, deep set eyes meet mine, and smile knowningly
For I am the Intruder................

IT'S BEEN AWHILE !!

2010-08-27T13:12:00.000-04:00

Haven't been here for some time, busy with summer, was home for two weeks in August , thanks to my super employers !! Was good to see everyone but glad to get back to cool weather.
And I was anxious about Presley as the court was making a decision as to where he was to go...fortunately he is going to be with his little sister whom he often talks about, who is with an RCMP family ...so that is a relief...though I am really heart broken that he has to leave at all...but I believe in the Gods, everything for a reason.We will be able to stay in touch , thank heavens !!

MEXICO part 3

2010-07-20T12:13:00.002-04:00

Yes that was quite the trip, we had a load to go to a little Island off Cancun during this time, Isla de Cozumel and we were there for 10 days waiting to off load, doing nothing, so Cap. let us use the jet boat to go ashore and we went ..every day !
It was a vacation for me as the boys all wanted to eat ashore along with their beers !! The one thing that stands out in my mind was the migration if these little blue crabs they had, man you couldn't walk without stepping on one, cute little buggers but a pain in the foot so to speak !!
we would visit this one bar that had a beautiful huge parrot about 15 years old that hated men and loved women so I got to hold him, this one time though this guy approached not knowing this and the parrot just about drove his toe nails into my arm, I had to quickly shake him off ...poor thing ..but he came back once settled.
We left Mexico with heavy hearts when our stint was up and flew back to Canada. The second engineer was totally upset as he thought the ship would be going back also, but it was sold to Pemex. He had planned to fill the pipes in the engine room with grass, bring it back to Canada and sell it !! The boy smoked too much !!
I have an infinity for this place and I don't know why, I was there long enough to fall in love with the "real" thing... not the tourist areas, which I can't stand, they are so different from the real Mexico, it is a little dangerous there now but only near the borders. Mexico has 29 world heritage sites, 62 ethnic groups, 30,000 archaeological sites, plus they are number one in tourist sites and number two in luxury tourism worldwide. I will be going back.
I was accepted to teach English at the Heslington Institute in Tehuacan , which is a beautiful city of 250 thousand people nestled between two mountain ranges about an hour south east of Puebla ( a world heritage site) Last June I went into Halifax to take the course for teaching English to foreign students so when I do go at least I'll have some background.
Tehuacan has a year round moderate temperature of approximately 78 degrees ( 25 C ) and a dry climate. A sought after area by geologists and horticulturists ( huge cactus grow there ). Also has one of the best mineral waters in the world and numerous hot springs...hotels are about 22.00 US for a 2-3 star which are quite beautiful in Mexico with the old courtyards and huge fans.
I would like to take a month and travel from the Silver Cities down through Tehuacan and over to Belize and maybe up to Progresso on the Yucatan...where we spent a lot of time. It would be fun to see it again. It would also be fun to take the air conditioned TV equipped buses between the cities and the "chicken buses" for off road excursions, I love chicken buses !!
Next year I will take a month off hopefully and head down to cruise through that beautiful country !

ONE OF THESE DAYS !!

2010-05-31T12:59:00.000-04:00

I have not been here for awhile ! The weather has been so great that I walk in the evenings instead of blogging , but I see I must finish the story of the trip to Mexico.... : )

MEXICO - MARYJANE- PYRAMIDS !! Part 2

2010-04-05T13:54:00.003-04:00

We have now arrived in Coatzacoalcos, Veracruz, Mexico ...totally saited on flying fish ! I am in awe...this place is unreal, nothing like the tourist ports I was later to discover. The smells that assulted our noses were scrumptious ! and we headed for the nearest restaurant and some food. For me the " Cameronies ( shrimp) were unbelievable delicious and huge. I never stopped eating them the whole time I was there. We ate from the vendors in the street , everything; not ever worried about anything, we drank bottled water however. None of the crew ever got sick ...well ...unless it was of their own making : )
We sent the Canadian crew back to Canada and just kept the Cdn.Officers, Cap of course, Chief and 1st mate, Chief and 1st Engineer and myself as Chief Cook. Then we brought on our Mexican crew to fill out the rest of the positions. The first experience ashore was something else, I was shocked at the living conditions, it was really sad, mother's sleeping in the streets with babes, elderly men with no legs surfing the streets on boards with 3 inch wheels, pitiful, I cried off and on for a month , it was that sad.

We spent the first couple of weeks in port , there was necessary paperwork to be done, name changed on the ship. We had sailed her under "Seaway Trader" coming down, now she was to be the "Patricia 11" contracted to Pemex ( the one and only oil company in all of Mexico , Gov. owned ) We got to go ashore every night so we would hang out in the local restaurant on the corner. At first there was a lot of finger pointing at me as my hair was light from so much sun and I was the only white woman around.
There was always a bunch of kids around begging and I kind of took to a little guy who wasn't more than 5, he wore the same clothes everyday for two weeks...so sad. I bought him a couple new t-shirts and shorts and took his old clothes and threw them. I wanted to take him on the ship as a steward in training but they couldn't let me, he was too young.
I made a point of always collecting change from the officers before I went ashore ( wasn't worth anything to us) and they just threw it in their desk drawers. Once ashore I would give it to the kids, it made a happy bunch of children !
I was sad to leave my little friends but we were ready for our job , taking oil from refineries up river and delivering offshore to the super tankers. As the days turned into weeks we became accustomed to the different ports.
The rivers were horridly polluted and people lived on them , swam and washed in the water and fished , unbelievable !! One of the ports had a sulfer plant and because we had no air conditioning, we had to keep the windows open. The sinks would be coated with a yellow dust all the time. Cap and I were concerned about inhaling this stuff but what could we do. We were working 3 months on , 3 off which meant 7 days a week but Captain Bunker was a good man and he and I decided that we would have a deck party at the end of every month. The crew loved these parties, the officers would challenge the deck hands to all kinds of contests. The one however they shouldn't have challenged was the " jalepeno eating contest ". Mexicans can eat those things by the dozen . Ray was our second engineer, as crazy as they come , and stoned most of the time, he was one of these people who could work while toasted ; he would go ashore and buy these huge packages of grass all wrapped up in banana leaves, measuring 4 inches think and a foot square. They would make stogies as big as cigars. The first contest with the jalepeno eating was a disaster for the Canadian boys the next day. Being the cook, I knew better. They however, were challenged and you know what happens when you challenge a man ? Needless to say there were some laughable outbursts as the peppers did their work !
Cap and I would do the grocery order every week or two depending on where we were. The markets we used were the same as the locals used , so it wasn't surprizing to see anything out of the ordinary. The thing that bothered me the most was the sale of turtles for food. They would drill a hole in the back of the shell and tie them together. Me being me, decided I would start saving turtles and buy them all up, so I would carry them away and let them go. This went on for weeks and then one day Captain Bunker started chortling just after I let a new bunch off in the ditch. I looked at him , I can still see those merry eyes of his and he said " you know Joyce , the kids figured out the first day what you were doing so they've been following you, picking up the turtles and selling them back to the market !! We laughed the whole way back to the ship.I kept doing it anyway, what the heck !
Cayaso was our 3rd engineer from Guatemala, a true gentleman, a tiny man, well read, quiet with a quick wit and about 63 years old then. What we found most amazing about him was his ability to get all the young women hanging off him when he went ashore. Most of the time we were at anchor so we had to use a boat going back and forth. About 11 oclock , there would be Cayaso, surrounded by 4 or 5 young ladies arriving back to ship to drop him off. This went on the whole time we were there, the guys would just shake their heads wondering.
About 7 weeks into our stint, we had a week off docked at the mile long wharf in Progresso. This beautiful town wasn't far from Merida, one of the oldest cities on the Yucatan. Captain Bunker gave us the weekend off so we went into town , got rooms at a wonderful old 2 star hotel ( which are the best in Mexico ) From there the boys decided it was time to party, being the only woman , I had to follow. We visited everything we could, tasted everything we could taste. Then we decided to go to Ushmal about an hour from Merida and see the pyramids at night .They had an amazing sound and light show and from the benches overlooking the courtyard you had a great view of everything. Off in the distance a storm flashed lightning behind the pyramids and the thunder rolled. Each doorway would light up as a King or minion would speak, the lights and sounds were fantastic, either that, or we were so stoned anything looked and sounded good.: ) to be continued.....

MEXICO ON AN OIL TANKER - Part 1

2010-03-15T22:22:00.001-04:00

I think my past life is more interesting ....for now anyway...so this is the story of my trip on a Canadian Oil Tanker to Mexico to work for a few months in 1987.
At the time my boyfriend was the Chief Mate of the Seaway Trader, an oil tanker owned by a NB company. She was a 75 year old 375 foot rust bucket suffering I know, from metal fatigue
.
I joined her on the Great Lakes winter of 86 , much to the consternation of dear Captain Bunker, a curmudgeon of an elderly English sea Captain ! ' Women do not belong on ships ' ! he said .......of course the first thing I realized was that the Cap LOVED food, so being brilliant of mind, I asked the Chief Mate to give the Chef the weekend off and let me cook... the Chef was estatic and drank the whole weekend ! ( biggest mistake he ever made) but that took care of the "women don't belong on ships "crap !!
Captain Bunker and I became good friends, I eventually had a very special place for that ole chap in my heart.
We spent many an afternoon passing up and down through the locks , bouncing off the walls on occasion as Cap, though a sweetie, sometimes screwed up on his maneuvers : ) all the while chatting about world affairs and the like. He seemed surprized that a woman knew stuff he knew, he was also surprized that I knew as much as I did about weather. Once I explained to him that I had helped the Chief Mate boyfriend with his captains exams , he understood.
We came down from the lakes in January, got stuck in the ice and had to be broke out, then proceeded on to Halifax. Once there, we had a few days grace, hit all the bars then got the call for a refit and contract to Mexico ..Wooo hooo...
Shelburne would be our refit port so off we go, me ...totally sea sick, as we were now out in the ocean sailing : ) . Finally ! good old Shelburne...for a few weeks. We had to be in Mexico by the 19th of March and the Company figured it would take us 21 days ...ha...
Back to the Chef...the poor dear made a huge mistake by taking that weekend off...HUGE...the Captain decided he would rather have "the woman" as his cook : ) so I ended up not only with a trip to Mexico but a job to boot !!
Off we go, transderm behind the ear ,and enough stores for 21 days ( cheap company cut her to the wire : )
doing fine till we hit a storm off Cape Hatteras, and I found out what it meant for a ship to corkscrew !
What fun , the galley was aft, officers quaters forward. Now...in order to get to quarters with 15 ' seas breaking over the decks, the mates had to tie a large rope from aft to forward so we could get back and forth. Not a problem ! we would just time the last wave and run like hell !
The real fun was feeding my crew...yup...so it was sandwiches for a couple of days and in order to feed the boys I had to get a couple of the crew in the galley to brace me so I could make them. We had everything tied down so nothing came snaking through the air to decapitate anyone.
Finally we make out of the storm just past the coast of North Carolina...and immediately we break down ! Apparently all that jigging around really stressed some of out machinery. Its a wonder the ship hadn't broken apart from metal fatique !!
So the Chief mate and chief engineer take a lifeboat and head to shore to get a part machined.
Captain Bunker ; not being one to have his crew stay idle, decided to have a life boat drill....
The Captain and I positioned ourselves on the bridge deck to watch over the precise maneuvers of the second engineer and the deck crew as they prepared for the drill.
Everything in order ; the second mate winches the lifeboat out over the side where it immediately lets go its chains and falls into shark invested water : )
If you ever wanted to see an excited Captain and some freaked out deck hands ...this was the opportunity...over goes the life savers and up comes the boys, sputtering and cursing like banshees...I had to go below to the cabin so I could crack up in quiet : )

We lost 3 days messing around off the coast of Carolina getting our part machined and put back together before we can carry on to Mexico.
The weather is now warm and I am able to catch some rays, we have birds travelling with us, they stay on board as we are so far from land. Then the porpoises join us and ride the wave our bulbous nose pushes forward, playing , jumping around , they are so beautiful and stay with us for hours.
The Bermuda triangle was something we had talked about and wondered if we would get through unscathed , we did , nothing happened : )
3 days from our port of Coatzacoalcos, Mexico , we run out of food. I had been telling Cap we were getting low and now I'm down to a bucket of salt herring. Not good !!
But low and behold , the good Lord provideth ! and along came the flying fish !! Every morning the decks were full of these lovely fish who just flew in right off the tips of the waves. I told the crew...boys you bring me as many as you can and I'll cook them up as best I can. Well , I can tell you,....I could easily have written a book after that trip on " 101 Ways To Cook Flying Fish " !! but my crew survived and were happy ; ) to a point.
to be continued....

Growing up stuff and grown up stuff...

2010-03-01T19:19:00.000-05:00

Was never a morning kid ....get out of a warm bed on a winter school morning, ran down stair, stuck my feet in the oven of the kitchen wood stove and went back to sleep. Now I am a morning person.

Killing bats with a broom in the attic on rainy days, skinning rabbits with brother Sandy, putting on our swim suits and running around in a summer rain storm. Having him beat the blood suckers off the back of my legs when we swam in the cove at Welchtown Lake. Walking with Sandy back and forth to school listening to him sing.

Sitting in the hay loft on boring Saturdays with a twenty-two , shooting rats when they stuck their heads out..It made me one heck of a good shot, now I don't like guns.

Cutting snakes in half to free the hop toads.

Hauling a team of oxen during Shelburne exhibition in the girls haul and later in the Ladies haul and once using Sandy's oxen, and beating his percentage !, the teamsters really ribbed him about that one .

After school, in the warm spring afternoons,sleeping under a pine tree half way across the Welchtown road until dad picked me up on his way by with the log truck, scaling logs on Welchtown Lake and running the logs ( log rolling ) to stay on .

Going to bed fully dressed In order not to miss out on going with dad back to camp on the weekends with the oxen.

I was usually always in charge of the game “Cowboys and Indians” in the neighborhood and was really pissed when my brother Sandy ,got the beautiful double holster guns for Christmas and I got the single gun with a canteen. !!

I bet 10 bucks with my Uncle Charlie who owned a pig house that I could save a runt pigs life, one winter night I took one home under my jacket because Charlie said it was going to die. ( I did save its life but never got paid ) I loved that Porky pig, even cried when they castrated him.... I learned about injustice when I sold that big hog for 50 bucks believing that they were keeping him for a pet too.... kids will believe anything.

I got to see a hurricane rip huge 15 foot sheets of tin off Uncle Charlie's barn roof; and another time watch five sets of lights (alien space ships ) pass over Uncle Harry's house. : )

I remember how shocked I was when Grampy Howard died, (I didn't know people died till then.) It took years before I understood that some day I would die.

My brother Sandy let me drive dads new Massey Ferguson tractor , which I ran into Charlie's pig house roof, Sandy got the blame for letting me drive it ......damage to tractor ......about a grand....roof was fine.

I wanted to be a vet for the longest time but we couldn't afford college..... I used to keep snakes in shoe boxes in the shop loft until one bit me, then I threw them all out.

I thank my father, bless his heart , for instilling in me that I was a tough little girl, and I could do anything.....!

I thank my mother , bless her heart , for having such tenacity in anything she did and for being such a darn good cook !

Uncle Charlies kids had a piebald horse, who was crazy. I was riding him down the lane, full gallop when he stopped dead in his tracks, threw me over his head and me landing on the dirt road, stunned. I heard the kids saying “is she dead” as I was coming around. I got my wind and got back on that miserable nag.

Charlies oldest boy was practiceing with the shotgun one day, pointed towards out house, good thing it was a distance because as I opened the porch door the pellets were hitting the screen.

My girlfriends pierced my ears by numbing them with ice...I was 13 and remember the needle going through.........sounded like a knife through cardboard.

We used to cut each other's hair with razor blades in the bathroom at school.

It wasn't until I had a rare cancer in 1991 and survived , that I realized that material things don't mean a dam thing, they really don't .

I lost one of my sons in 2001 and with that ....a terrible hidden feeling of emptiness pervades my whole body on a daily basis and will until the day I die. This I know to be true.

With age comes the willingness to accept people for who they are (though at times its hard and you just want to kick some in the butt ! ) and of course me understanding me, and knowing there are times when some people want to kick my butt ! That's just too bad : ) .

I love to laugh more than anything, cook up a storm, go off on adventures, hang out with true friends and sometimes just spend time alone (keeps me centered)

I love small towns to live in and big cities to visit.

I love being over 50 years old, there is a freedom and understanding that comes with this age.

If there is ever an underground group formed to shoot convicted pedophiles I will probably be on the board and have the best and biggest hand gun.

My feelings about legalizing grass ? Why not ? just about everyone I have known in my life has smoked it , and thats a lot of people ....yet I know none who are addicted and most; including myself who just don't bother with it anymore or occasionally take a puff if offered.. Actually I know more people with drinking problems ! so there you go !!

I don't know what I would do without my very best non human friends , Maddy and Jackson, and my human friends , Kimmie, Monk, Char, and the rest of the "bush women" of Ohio.

I believe the worst thing that could happen to you ,(other than losing a child), is dying regretting that you didn't do something. .....so whatever your thinking and whatever the dream “ just get it done " !

I am totally of the belief that the human race should become extinct in order to save every other life form on this planet. And that thought greatly saddens me.

My Brother Sandy.....

2010-02-21T11:52:00.001-05:00

Why doesn't time heal when you lose a loved one? I have these bursts of energetic bawling every once in awhile , and I feel so sad, so utterly sad without my brother here to talk to. I just want to look into those warm eyes of his, hear him laugh,and tell a joke or a story, just to feel his presence, knowing he is there for me to call and talk to, or run up to Charles's pit , see if he's around. Of course being here in the Arctic, it would be the phone calls.
When I went to Alberta I called him a fair bit because he was my anchor to home, to my childhood, he was always that, always the tie to the past. He was solid, a presense that I just adored.
We spent all our time together as kids, Sandy was a year older, we always walked to school together, he always got me through the tough times, like talking me across the bridge when the river was so high that the water lapped across the boards, talked me down out of pine trees when I went so high that I scared myself. Yea he was the man.
I remember the 3 mile walks home from school, he was always singing, and always walked with his chin up and a bounce in his step, those little traits continued on through out his life and later with an added confidence, he walked that same road till his death.
I remember him protecting me when our two older brothers were fighting and scared me , and I would cry, I remember when we got a home made beer from under the wood house step ( where dad 'hid" them ) and had our first swig and got tipsy....... I remember when we rolled up cigarettes of pine spills and tried to smoke them..... and challenged each other on the easter egg hunts to see who got the most....the trips to " Mary's old house" to see what we could salvage, sneaking down to Uncle Harry's after dark to steal grapes off the vines...the walks down to the lake to swim in the cove....the times he would beat blood suckers off the backs of my legs with a stick...skinning rabbits we caught in our snares...building tunnels in the hay mow using the bales of hay.....and the time we baby sat for our cousins down the lane and got into Grampys desk and his sherry and chocolates.....the time he got yelled at for letting me drive the new Massey Fergason tractor and running it into Uncle Charlie's pig house roof , causing over a thousand dollars in damage... going to Don grovestines store to buy our new jeans ( Levi's)for exhibition...later on his talks to me when my first husband and I were breaking up...his advice was to stay, work it out, but it was too late that talk, to-day I look back and see how right he was and know why he had a marriage that lasted well over 40 years...... yea, he was a big part of my child hood, a big part of my life...always there when I needed him.... and now he's gone.

THE NEWS

2010-02-06T12:57:00.000-05:00

Time is passing fast here in this unforgiving land, it is February already. We had planned to be here another year, but the spirits have intervened again and the plan has changed. We are leaving in August for Toronto, not one of my favourite places mind you, but I am assured we will not be downtown ! And we will have a yard : ) and maybe I can grow some greens : )
Though I would have not minded another year here ; I look forward to moving as I can fly home on long weekends and see my pups and my son and grandchildren. And hopefully my grandson Patrick will come visit from Alberta or vice versa.
It will be such a treat to see my sister, brother ,Kimmie,Char, Monk and the rest of the gang. I promised my brother Karl that I would bring Bison and Musk Ox burger's for a big Bar-B-Q !!

ARCTIC DAYS ...

2010-01-20T12:25:00.000-05:00

The weather is so interesting up here...: ) either freeze your butt off high wind chill days, snappy cold sunny days , snappy cold cloudy days, blustery snowy days, or decent cold sunny days, whatever the weather, it is different !! For example today is a blustery snowy day but its a bit warmer than usual which means the snow is packy and sticking to the windows !.Also windy enough that the table I'm working on moves every once in awhile from a wind gust, of course , having no basement and stuck up on stilts,it has to be expected : )

BLIZZARDS AND BURGERS

2010-01-16T19:57:00.000-05:00

Just came in awhile ago from a wonderful blizzard type storm with a wind chill of minus 50 ..!! yaaahooo, another "A" one experience in my life, almost didn't make it up the dam hill because I couldn't see two feet in front of me !! had it not been for the car ahead of me I'd still be sitting on the side of the road wondering where "home" was !
Why was I out in that you ask ? Well its Saturday, my day off so I said to hell with the weather I'm going down the hill to check some stuff out so off I went It wasn't THAT bad when I left, blowing, but I could see : )
Went to the Library, went to find an artist I had planned to look up ( I should have called first I guess , as she wasn't home)went to the North Mart to price some stuff and buy lotto tickets ( does anyone ever win up here ? )
Then decided to check out the Nova Hotels Lounge " The Kickin Caribou" Wow , a very nice place, friendly tarbenders, Jordan for one , great guy, bought my ticket for the Superbowl Feb. 7th party and thought ...think I'll come back and have a Musk Ox Burger !!, so went home, unloaded some stuff , changed clothes and away I went. Needless to say , for someone who doesn't really partake of the red meats, this was definately one heck of a good darn good burger, soon going back for fresh frozen haddock which he says will match anything from Nova Scotia !! Obviously he hasn't had my buddy Rickys fish !! but I will give them the benefit of the doubt and try it.: )

3 MONTHS YOU SAY !! RANT TIME !!

2010-01-16T18:35:00.000-05:00

Cripes, I though it was only 2 weeks ago that I got off the plane !....soooo, well, so far not a bad place to be , could be worse, could be in Haiti ! What in Gods name did those poor people ever do to deserve the shit kicking their taking I ask ?? Christ... enough allready.
I try to stay on top of whats going on but I just cry too much so I've had to stop looking at the videos and pictures, sent money , nothing more to do but pray to God things will soon turn around.
Oh and I get so pissed at these idiots who rant " Why isn't anyone doing anything? " Why don't they get in there and give them food and water " well I'll tell you why dipshits...they can't ...when you have a country so poor that lacks even the normal infrastructure what do you expect? Think of it this way ...you family are starving , their on the other side of the house, you can only get there through the front door , but there is crap piled 6 feet high in every room of the house and guess what " you have no arms !! Got it ??
Oh, I have to stop....I could go on and on and on about those a--holes : )

"Giving is healing"

2009-12-26T15:32:00.000-05:00

I see Cardinals everywhere now, they stared coming shortly after I saw the first one in the tree. They come in different forms, the first was a Christmas card the next month after we lost him, the beautiful red bird embossed on a white background, Then in February , in a container of flowers, March a door knocker, and on and on, they have never stopped coming, all of a sudden they were everywhere, he is with me.
I don't know why I am able to put this to paper now, probably because finally I am able to speak the unspeakable ? Is it because of where I am; here in this beautiful strange land? Whatever it is it is. Thank-you Kim; as you said “giving is healing “ and a big thanks to Edna. I can rest now, knowing that my son is at peace.

After thoughts...

2009-12-25T16:31:00.000-05:00

It is 8 years later, yet it still seems like yesterday, I guess it always will. I think a lot about that night, driving back there, thinking, “woman you are nuts” ,it was just your imagination, I can go with that, but what gets me is, how did I know where to go ?
You never get over this, time does not heal the loss of a child , time heals the loss of some loves, parents ,siblings, husbands ,wives, aunts, uncles, but never a child.
Nothing heals the loss, because you physically lose a part of yourself, especially a mother , it is there in your heart/soul/mind and gut forever. Time makes it easier to bear, just a little easier, even now I just have to think about him and the ache and the tears will come. I had never given much thought to dying until I lost him, it was then I knew dying in his place would be a good way to go.
I will cry for the loss of my oldest son until I meet him again, and I know that that's the way it is and always will be, and I will handle that.

Spiritual guidance...

2009-12-22T10:37:00.000-05:00

Its the Wednesday night before the weekend , its already dark, about 7:30 pm, I'm watching TV, hubby's asleep. Without any thought what so ever , I get up, walk into the kitchen , pick up the keys to the truck, jump in and drive into the darkness......

It's not that far up the highway where I have to turn up the Wentworth Road. About a mile up the road I start to cry, really wailing, I pull over, I can't do this. All of a sudden ,Shawn is beside me, he says its OK mum, its OK, I'm with you, so I keep driving, there are roads everywhere,I can't believe how many , a maze of woods roads that all look alike and I am talking out loud and agitated and desperately thinking, I will never find it , he says its OK mum ,its OK and 45 minutes later , by myself in the dark , in the middle of no where ,with my son beside me,we arrive. There is the marker that the boys had put up and there is the corner.
We drive around the corner and back, around and back, around and back, five times, all the while me trying to determine what had happened, how did this happen Shawnie, what happened ? and then he tells me, “ I was just going too fast mum, no seat belt, you know me.”
I situated the truck so the lights would shine on the cross on the hill , got out, climbed up the little embankment, and sat there for the longest time, crying the longest and hardest I had ever in my whole life. Then I drove home, by myself, calm in my mind that now I knew why. The next day, I couldn't believe I had done that, and many ,many times since I have wondered how I had. I can only write it off to spiritual guidance.

But before this...

2009-12-20T20:36:00.000-05:00

So now I have to go back in time to 1991 ,before I go on with this otherwise you will think me crazy, yes , I too have though it myself, but the more I talk to people who have experienced this sort of thing, the more I think I'm OK...well maybe.
I was born a skeptic, I have only ever believed in what I could see,when it came to the spirit world of any sort, religious or otherwise , forget it, I was not convinced of any of it,and then my mother died.
Were it not for a friend of mine with me that day , I would say I was crazy and off my rocker and had imagined the whole thing.
She was dying of cancer, I was on my way to Halifax for a checkup after my cancer operation. My friend drove and when we came abreast of Liverpool a sea gull swooped down in front of the car , back to us , and we hit it , or vice versa, did some damage to the chrome trim so we continued on.I became very anxious. Once finished my appointment, I insisted on driving back. I was agitated, and by the time I got to Bridgewater I could clearly hear my mother singing as plain as if she were sitting in the back seat. I looked over at my friend and said "do you hear that", do you hear that singing ? the look was "are you out of your mind" and no,I hear nothing. I just kept driving, listening , then asked " are you sure" more blank stares and an offer to take the wheel.
As I approached Liverpool again, I blurted out " there's a message on the answering machine from Sandy". No more was said and as soon as I got home , the message was there. He said, " get up here as soon as you can", I did,just in time for her to move her head close to my neck, sigh and pass on, to hopefully a better place. I was singing the song she had been singing to me on my way back from Halifax.
My first ever encounter with something that was not in my world of black and white. Then we come forward ten years. I still believe,or the only reason I can justify for these strange happenings is the connection you have and the stress your body deals with when you lose a loved one. Either its one hell of an imagination or there is a spiritual connection to help quiet your soul.

Into the Darkness

2009-12-17T20:22:00.000-05:00

I had never gone to the site, I couldn't, but I knew that I had to go that next November and I knew why. I had seen his vehicle , the Polaris with the roll bars that he was so proud of when he brought it out to my house to leave for a few days before heading back to camp. He took me for a ride, so happy that he wouldn't have to wear a helmet anymore , though it did have seat belts.
When I saw it after the accident I couldn't even look at it, it almost made me sick.The question that haunted me was 'why' why did this happen ? Everything happens for a reason. What was the reason ? The statement was "they weren't going that fast, nor that slow". No booze, no drugs. So I thought, you need to go there , yes, you can do this , pick a nice day on the anniversary weekend, maybe Sunday, get directions and a map drawn up on Friday by people who knew where it was.
That was the plan.
I don't know what happened to the plan, I guess Shawn had a different idea.
Its the Wednesday night before the weekend , its already dark, about 7:30 pm, I'm watching TV, hubby's asleep. Without any thought what so ever , I get up, walk into the kitchen , pick up the keys to the truck, jump in and drive into the darkness......

The Wilderness

2009-12-15T09:10:00.000-05:00

Six months later, sick at heart and unfocused, I knew I had to get away, anywhere, so I took a break and went into the wilderness. Here there would be strangers, I would not meet people who knew my son, I would not have to act anything, I would be able to cry and scream in peace. I worked at a Lodge in the summer and was the caretaker of the property on closing from October to June, along with a huge Turkish Anatolian hound.
The winters alone were a partial healing for me, to be alone , with the three dogs, wondering the back roads in the snow, I would cry to the trees, and see him behind every one. He was there with me, every day when no one else was around, he kept me company. This time away seemed to be what I needed for awhile, but the total healing that I craved was not coming. There were times I thought I was losing my mind, and only my strength of character and thoughts of the rest of my family kept me going.

Please God, bring back my son...

2009-12-14T08:43:00.001-05:00

I prayed that night, cried and prayed ,hard, that God would just switch us, just switch, if you have all the control in the world you can do it, please God, please bring him back, you can have me , really you can have me. I'll do anything , anything.
I cannot even remember most of what I did and when, but certain things still come to mind. I remember sitting on the coach, looking out the window and wondering why the trees were still green, why the sun was still shining and especially, why the hell were people still moving around ? it made me angry.
Then there was a day when I just lost it, sobbing so hard that I could hardly breath,praying so hard for my son to just tell me that he was still here. Then outside the window a male Cardinal landed in the tree, my mind said,"there he is", he stayed for several minutes to let me know that it was OK, he was still with me. Of course this is what I believe because I had to have something to believe, you just have to have something to hold onto.
For awhile, after the funeral,my dreams brought him home, he was just fishing in Newfoundland somewhere, he was just away.
Nothing worked.

The Shock

2009-12-13T05:41:00.000-05:00

As my sons father left the house, I started to lose it, really fast,the air left me, the feeling in the center of my being was nothing I had ever felt before, something had just reached inside me and ripped out everything, I felt light headed, I was floating, It took my breath away for several seconds and when it came back I was screaming so hard that my dogs, with ears and tails down, ran for cover. To this day the little male cannot stand to hear a raised voice.
Sometime later, seconds, minutes, hours, my body came back to that space in the kitchen, damaged beyond repair. Then shock took over and I stayed that way for weeks. No one noticed. Later that morning or sometime that day I must have decided that I could change this horror story, I was not going to let it happen. I went to see him,thinking, I can fix this, I have to fix this , but I couldn't wake my son up, I couldn't kiss him and make it better anymore. I walked away, devastated that I could not save my child.I returned home,seething in absolute rage.
I went out to the woods behind the shed and beat a tree to death.

Early Morning

2009-12-11T16:45:00.000-05:00

It's 7 am. Nov/9/01.... early morning...

The father of my children is sitting in my kitchen. When I come around the corner, still sleepy from my bed I find him sitting, slightly hunched, just inside the kitchen door, he has on jeans and a light shirt with a jacket. He sits with his knees together and his hands on his thighs, twisting a wet facecloth, I'm thinking, why did you bring a wet face cloth ?, I have face cloths. he starts talking slowly, very slowly ,his voice is very shaky and as I listen to what he's saying, my clothes start to puff. I see his lips moving,what ?. My mind starts screaming ,what are you saying ? My body is puffing , what is happening to my body ?,
Then he stopped talking and I looked at him, and said matter of fact ; noooo, you have the story wrong !, that's not possible !, its not possible !, your mistaken !, it's someone else, you didn't understand what they told you, right,? it was someone else, your confused, you didn't really, you didn't get it right, oh my God , I am desperate for the right answer, just give me the dam right answer.!
But the more I focused on his eyes and his face I knew, then my heart knew, then my soul knew, that the father of my children would never,ever have come to see me, unless he was right.

PUFF !!

2009-12-10T15:58:00.001-05:00

Do you know what it's like to feel that your body is air and its just filling out your clothes like a balloon , you can feel the pressure , Oh my God it hurts , and any second you know, in no uncertain terms, that your soul will leak out into the atmosphere , floating, floating , and then you will disintegrate .
There are some out there who probably understand what that feeling is, a lot more than I ever thought, but who ever thinks that something like this would ever really happen to you. It happens to other people, not you, definitely not to you.

I thought, how arrogant of you to think that you were safe ! Well , I'm sorry , but what parent ever thinks that this is actually going to happen, right ?, because you never go beyond that point , thinking about it , NEVER, but the thing is and the cruelty of it is , it happens.....

IT'S SO DIFFICULT....

2009-12-10T15:54:00.000-05:00

It's so hard to talk about losing a child, I am crying the whole way through this but my friend Kim says that you must "spill it out to the world" in order to start the healing process. I thought it would be easier this way, writing to a non entity...but this is not so , it is still hell to do...

THE NIGHTMARE .....

2009-12-09T02:51:00.000-05:00

..... Is it like this with all parents ? Sometimes, just before going to sleep at night you have these scenario's play out in your thoughts...you know , how you are trying to go to sleep and you start to have horrible imaginings , especially when you are really worried about your kids , and you keep pushing them to the back of your mind......That happened to me a lot , tears would come and I would have to force myself to think of something else, it was always something really awfull that had happened to one of my boys, and when it did, their father would come to me and tell me, it was always him , and it was always early morning....then when I came close to thinking something that I wouldn't be able to stand ,I would stop and force myself to stop thinking and go to sleep as I just couldn't imagine beyond that point, I just couldn't.
.......The walls are stark, snow white, and there are many, many rooms, more than any normal house might have , maze like, the doors are a dull, coal black and placed in such a way that none are opposite each other but every room has two.
.... I see them tie his feet with a hemp rope that's at least 2 inches thick, he's wearing his leather jacket and his black cap...... oh God... it hurts to watch because I know the intent,I know what their doing,I start to sob.... I see the truck, big , black , and I know its very powerfull, I am frozen, I am trying to scream for him to get away... I watch the rope being snaked through all the rooms, I can see the people who are doing it, running in and out, in and out, but there is no detail to their faces... Once it's through the house , I see it being tied to the truck , I cannot scream at them to stop, my vocal chords are numb, I am so helpless... the tears start , the tires start screeching away from the building , his body begins hitting walls , I hear the thud and crunch , I wake up , tears pouring down my face , sobbing so hard I can hardly breath, and realize I am in my bed and its only a nightmare.
...... All day it comes back to me and fresh tears flow , with just the thought of the horror, it stays with me for weeks.
......This is the second one I remember, nightmare that is, though there have been many before. One had him in a trunk, it was being tied, they were going to throw him overboard....who " they " are , I have no idea , these are the dreams of a mother who is terrified for her child... terrified that when he goes to sea he may never come back...these night terrors became so real to me that I felt I had to tell him, and so I did.
My oldest son was a commercial fisher and when I knew he was at sea in stormy weather , I could hardly sleep, so I told him about the nightmares....he laughed , my son said ...mum...don't worry about me , if I ever go overboard it will be a peaceful way to die...just slip into the cold, cold water and within minutes go to sleep...how peaceful is that, he says.......after this conversation ,the dreams stopped...no more came and I slept sound when he was at sea. It wasn't until later that I learned he actually was afraid of drowning...his words to me were just to calm me, and it had worked. He was a good boy.
.....Then one early morning his father came to see me, and I was taken beyond that point....

GOOD DEEDS !!

2009-12-05T17:07:00.000-05:00

Presley and I decided to do some good deeds and thank some very important people in our neighbourhood. I had made 46 Northern Iced delights last night so we split them and took them to the members at the RCMP and our other friends at the Fire Department and the Paramedics. We think that they had a great coffee break !!

WHERE THE HECK ??

2009-11-25T18:47:00.000-05:00

OMG...!! This has got to be the strangest place...you would think that the Frobisher Inn is nothing but a hotel...wrong !! The sign says thus but...... If you go inside . other than the Inn . you will find the local swimming pool, the theater, a clothing store, a video store and a convenience store next door to a lounge !! And who would know ??, obviously not the new arrivals, because there is not one sign telling you that there is anything other than the Inn . And not just here, it took me a week to find the fish store, no signs legible unles your standing two feet in front of the building, no street signs to tell you there's something down that one...nothing !! I wonder if its a game they like to play with the newbies ??

PSYCHIC'S

2009-11-18T06:49:00.000-05:00

Edna Aker is a psychic (www.canadianpsychic.ca ) from Kentville in the valley NS. She is very well known in NS and probably elsewhere. Now I didn't believe in these people , but over the years I have met people who do, but I was always the " seeing is believing sort ", until a friend of mine was talking about a reading she had and all the stuff coming true over a period of time after the reading so I , knowing her life personally , listened to her CD and shit , right !!
So , still being a skeptic, I emailed her with a fake email, name and a phone # that wasn't mine and did so behind the back of my friend : ) (just in case)
I had a reading at the end of May. She asked only for my first and middle name on the phone
....she knew.....
that I had a circulation problem with one arm and that I should see a Doctor, I did have and I did see and I had a pinched nerve that kept putting my arm to sleep at night ( 1 for her )
.....she knew that I had a screwed up knee and one leg ( same ) was in really bad shape and that I nearly killed myself physically the year before ( Alberta working 12 hour days 7 days a week for 4 months with 1 week off the whole time) I had Achilles tendinitis, stressed hamstring, and a pulled tendon in the knee plus , she said " you have arthritis in your knee, (at the time she was right. (2 for her )

.......she knew that I had been to the valley, in fact within 10 minutes of her house , she said that could only be the Kentville hospital which is where I had been for getting the knee looked at ( 3 for her)
she knew that I had or was taking a course ,( I took the English Language for Teachers ( ESL) in Halifax the following month, ) The course was in June and I stayed at my friends in Halifax. When I had called her to tell her I had been accepted she said , remember Joyce , Edna had told me that a friend would be staying with me for awhile who had arthritis. (4 for her )
......she said I would have 3 funerals this year and one would be traumatic for the family ( she didn't say my family ) but the 3 funerals were my brother Sandy , which was traumatic. The other two , my Uncle Bobby and Karen's brother Perry. I don't know if my brother Karl remembers , but after moving here I had called him and towards the last of the conversation I asked him if anyone had died ...he said no and then a short time later his brother-in-law had. Why I asked I don't know ....
( 5 for her)
.......she told me I would be spending Christmas with someone I didn't expect to spend it with or really didn't know that well , well here I am and I won't be going home till next November !! ( 6 for her) .....there is a lot more that she talks about, some things haven't happened yet......some have ..going to court, and not to worry about that as it will turn out to be fine ( These nit wits we outed selling swamp land on ebay and stopped them )
.......someone wants me to sell my house..I have been asked , she said don't and I'm not .( 7 for her)
.......she says that I'm always taking care of other's and I should take care of myself more (doing that now)
....that I am very sensitive , and will be to the day I die, that my bark is way worse than my bite ! the sensitivity is starting to show more in my beginning senior years , and that I will live to be ancient , now this people , this is not something I relish !! .... that I need to baby my eyes ( I need glasses bad ( 8/9/10/11/12 for her)
........she talks of a person who's deceased around me who I talk to a lot , who wants to go to a higher plain who I will be able to contact twice if I so wish. I believe this to be my son Shawn...and because of my distrust ......I decided to contact a different psychic which I did and she talked about him as if she knew him.....
.....There is a lot more that has happened or hasn't happened as yet , specific things, three in particular are very interesting if they happen ...stay tuned !!
.......This coming month (Dec.) I have set another appointment with Edna ,but not to know about me, I want to talk with my son and my brother's .....so stay tuned and we'll see what happens.

AND HERE WE ARE !!

2009-11-16T09:54:00.000-05:00

How one perceives something is a truly personal thing....like wine...the taste you love is not necessarily the expensive bottle ...nor the cheapest, so when stepping off a plane in the North it is a very personal experience...you either love it or you hate it...I don't think you could be happy just liking it here. Who after all just likes wine ?
Now one understands the use of Inuksuits here......rocks had to be used as there are no &^%$ing trees !!

THE WALK ABOUT

2009-11-16T08:54:00.000-05:00

This past summer has been terribly sad...losing my brother has been another heart felt trauma to deal with, I miss him so much. I retreated to Lake Deception in August and spent some time camping with the dogs , catching up with my dear friend Char and wondering what I would do, or where I would go.
It was not time to go to Mexico, I could feel that.
Many nights I sat at the waters edge crying my eyes out for my brother's , Sandy and Jerry ,and my son Shawn, all those whom I have lost has made me appreciate living . I wondered what would happen next, where would the winds take me . And as usual , things fall into place at the last minute and I am on another walk about, this time to the Great White North .